Showing posts with label astrology. Show all posts
Showing posts with label astrology. Show all posts

Sunday, March 18, 2012

The Baltimore Sun offers "more comprehensive" woo in lieu of news!

Today, The Baltimore Sun announced, "Starting today, a more comprehensive horoscope column moves to the main news section, where it will appear daily."

Way to go, Sun. It's so nice to know you've chosen to use your ever-shrinking news pages to publish not just nonsense, but to publish more comprehensive nonsense. That's just the kind of "news" feature sure to enhance the knowledge of your readers and their understanding of important events. What a wonderful contribution to our community. And daily, too!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Email spam: Dream Horoscope

My latest weird woo-spam:



I can't be positive of what will happen, although I can take a good guess, but one thing I know won't happen, either today or tomorrow, is that I'll pay $10 for a 10 minute astrology reading, which the website that sent me the ad should have already known since they can forecast the future, right? Weird that they would still send me this useless email. Well, useless for them, but not entirely useless for me, because I got something silly to blog about. Did they foresee that?

Monday, January 31, 2011

Astrology Angst

The recent news story that the zodiac signs have shifted due to the earth's wobble, and that the stars are off by about a month in their "alignment," have thrown my astrology-believing friends into a twitter on Twitter, and a Facebook fluster.

Until this news hit, I didn't realize that I had so many friends who believe that astrology is credible, or that my friends who post their daily horoscope on Twitter and Facebook weren't doing it just for entertainment, but because they feel it has predictive and/or prescriptive value.

Watching their distress as the news that they may not be born under the zodiac sign that they thought they were is both amusing and confounding.

"I don't know who I am anymore," a friend wailed. "I thought I was a Gemini, but I'm really a Cancer?!" 

Another friend was defiant: "I know I'm a Scorpio, and no silly astronomer is going to change that! There's no way in hell that I'm a Libra!" 

"I'm an Ophiuchus now? I don't even know what an Ophiuchus is! And my horoscope doesn't give insight or advice about Ophicucus. Now what?"


The biggest shock though was the post of a friend who turned out to be a practicing astrologer. He wrote:
Learning astrology was difficult enough the first time around, I refuse to relearn any of it. As it was, astrology was already too easily dismissed by many as superstitious nonsense, and this is only going to exacerbate that kind of disrespect for this ancient tradition. Are they going to rewrite every Ephemeris from the past couple of hundred years now? 
Myself, on the whole, I'm actually rather pleased with the Zodiac changes. Until now, I'd thought I was a Capricorn, which was fine with me. Didn't the Capricorn traits "practical, prudent, careful, ambitious, disciplined, patient, humorous and reserved" describe me perfectly? OK, maybe not patient. And not always so disciplined. Although, admittedly I'd always wondered what was wrong with me that I wasn't even close to being either "miserly" or "pessimistic" as a Capricorn is supposed to be.

But now...I find out that I'm really a Sagittarius! I'm "optimistic, jovial, freedom loving, honest, intellectual and philosophical"! Yes!!! That makes more sense. Now those traits describe me perfectly. But oh-oh, my optimism is "blind optimism"? That's not good. And I'm "irresponsible"? Well, hell of a time to find out now. I only wish I'd known when I was a lot younger. I seem to have wasted a lot of potentially fun years being terribly responsible. OK, admittedly I am sometimes "tactless," but I've been trying so hard not to be. Do I have to quit trying? And I'm "careless" too. Really? I don't even think I know how to act carelessly because I've been posing as a careful Capricorn all these years. I guess I need to take some careless lessons. Any Sagittariuns out there who can give me some pointers? Heh. I guess that may be my typical Sagittarius tactlessness showing there.

Monday, November 15, 2010

In the community: Woo vs woo?


How does a customer decide which woo to choose? 

Are astrology and tarot cards complementary woo or competing woo?

Is this the woo equivalent of an interfaith center in which different irrational practices may be practiced by people who, although they share a building and a belief in silly things, don't share the same belief in the same silly things?

Can you get two different predictions if you do both woos? If not, why even offer two woos? Wouldn't one woo be enough woo?

And, really, if the astrologer and/or card reader could truly predict the future, would they have set up shop in Dundalk, Maryland? Not dissing Dundalk, but seriously. Someone who can predict the future bases herself in the obscurity of Dundalk? Why? Could it be because enough gullible people willing to pay someone to tell them fairy tales about their future live in the Dundalk area?