Astrology Angst

The recent news story that the zodiac signs have shifted due to the earth's wobble, and that the stars are off by about a month in their "alignment," have thrown my astrology-believing friends into a twitter on Twitter, and a Facebook fluster.

Until this news hit, I didn't realize that I had so many friends who believe that astrology is credible, or that my friends who post their daily horoscope on Twitter and Facebook weren't doing it just for entertainment, but because they feel it has predictive and/or prescriptive value.

Watching their distress as the news that they may not be born under the zodiac sign that they thought they were is both amusing and confounding.

"I don't know who I am anymore," a friend wailed. "I thought I was a Gemini, but I'm really a Cancer?!" 

Another friend was defiant: "I know I'm a Scorpio, and no silly astronomer is going to change that! There's no way in hell that I'm a Libra!" 

"I'm an Ophiuchus now? I don't even know what an Ophiuchus is! And my horoscope doesn't give insight or advice about Ophicucus. Now what?"

The biggest shock though was the post of a friend who turned out to be a practicing astrologer. He wrote:

Learning astrology was difficult enough the first time around, I refuse to relearn any of it. As it was, astrology was already too easily dismissed by many as superstitious nonsense, and this is only going to exacerbate that kind of disrespect for this ancient tradition. Are they going to rewrite every Ephemeris from the past couple of hundred years now? 

Myself, on the whole, I'm actually rather pleased with the Zodiac changes. Until now, I'd thought I was a Capricorn, which was fine with me. Didn't the Capricorn traits "practical, prudent, careful, ambitious, disciplined, patient, humorous and reserved" describe me perfectly? OK, maybe not patient. And not always so disciplined. Although, admittedly I'd always wondered what was wrong with me that I wasn't even close to being either "miserly" or "pessimistic" as a Capricorn is supposed to be.

But now...I find out that I'm really a Sagittarius! I'm "optimistic, jovial, freedom loving, honest, intellectual and philosophical"! Yes!!! That makes more sense. Now those traits describe me perfectly. But oh-oh, my optimism is "blind optimism"? That's not good. And I'm "irresponsible"? Well, hell of a time to find out now. I only wish I'd known when I was a lot younger. I seem to have wasted a lot of potentially fun years being terribly responsible. OK, admittedly I am sometimes "tactless," but I've been trying so hard not to be. Do I have to quit trying? And I'm "careless" too. Really? I don't even think I know how to act carelessly because I've been posing as a careful Capricorn all these years. I guess I need to take some careless lessons. Any Sagittariuns out there who can give me some pointers? Heh. I guess that may be my typical Sagittarius tactlessness showing there.

Email spam: The Almighty Bible

I don't know if I've recently been added to some unfortunate spam list, or whether my spam filters just aren't catching everything they used to, but I've started receiving spam on two previously spam-free email accounts. 

None of the recent spam has been the typical "enlarge your penis" or "refill your male sex medications" spam. Instead, the spam all seems to be ads linked to websites for a wide variety of products--but, just like the more typical spam, not a single one so far seems to be targeted to my needs or interests.

For example, this ad:

Ah, yes, just what an atheist whose atheist children are now adults would buy. Although I am a little tempted to send for the FREE Book of Genesis, which The Almighty Bible promotion site assures me is "PERFECT FOR ALL AGES!"

At least the ad admits that the books are "graphic novels," and doesn't claim they're non-fiction "as dictated by God," and that the books are only "biblically accurate," not, you know, "factually accurate."

A Joyous Solstice!

Facebook Follies: Christmas edition

Today's Facebook Folly, just in time for Christmas:

Keep CHRIST in CHRISTMAS...Who's with me?

No one is stopping you from keeping Christ in your Christmas. Go right ahead, and do just that. Christ your Christmas all you want.

The problem is, you want people who don't believe in, or care about, the mythical son of your invisible, magical sky guy (who is also his own mythical son), to be required to keep Christ in their Christmas. 

And to that, I give this sassy, but elegant, reply: Pffffttttt!

Celebrate the real reason for the season: axial tilt. A joyous solstice to you!

Facebook Follies: Save Christmas, Kick Out Immigrants

Today's Facebook Folly is this inane rant:

We Can't say 'MERRY CHRISTMAS' anymore, We Now Say 'HAPPY HOLIDAYS ! We Can't call it a 'CHRISTMAS TREE', We Now Call It a 'HOLIDAY TREE,Because it might offend someone! They call it 'CUSTOMS', We Call it 'TRADITIONS'.This is 'OUR COUNTRY!' If U Wanna Live & Work here have Some RESPECT! If U Dont like it, GO HOME! If u agree with this, PLEASE post as ur status. OH, By the way.♥☆MERRY CHRISTMAS!♥♥☆ ♥

This rant is even less rational (if that's possible) than the usual "war on Christmas" and immigrant bashing that I too often see in my Facebook newsfeed. I couldn't make any sense out of the connection between the "I'm not allowed to say the word 'Christmas' anymore!" part of the rant, and the "GO HOME!" part. I'm thinking that's because there isn't any connection--other than the same people who whine about the "war on Christmas" are frequently also immigrant-fearers. Like my friend who posted the rant apparently is. 

Paranoia strikes deep.

I don't usually say anything to my friends about their regular Jesus-praising, praying, and Bible quoting on Facebook. But I will confront bigotry whenever I see it, and if the bigot wants to defriend me, on Facebook or in real life, *shrug*.

So I asked the friend who posted that rant some questions that I thought might help me her "get" what I she didn't "get":

1. Who is stopping you from saying "Merry Christmas"? And when, where, and how have you been stopped from saying "Merry Christmas"?

2. If you said "Merry Christmas" to someone, what would happen?

3. Who is stopping you from calling the decorated tree in your house a "Christmas tree?" If you referred to it as a "Christmas tree," what would happen to you?

4. What's the difference between a "custom" and a "tradition"?

5. Do you realize that many native-born Americans do not celebrate Christmas? They are already in their country, they are already at "home," and they have every right to continue to live and work here.

6. Do you realize that many of the recent immigrants are Christians who celebrate Christmas, and so are not the least "offended" if you wish them a "Merry Christmas?

[Blogger's note: by the time I got to this part of composing my questions to my friend, I was feeling increasingly irritated, and, therefore, more sassy, as is reflected by what followed...]

7. When did the law change so that immigrants are not allowed into the U.S. if they don't agree to always say "Merry Christmas," and never say "Happy Holidays"? Or are you now in charge of U.S. immigration law and policy?

8. It appears that you are offended when someone wishes you a "Happy Holiday," rather than "Merry Christmas." Why do you have the right to be offended by "Happy Holidays," but some other American doesn't have the similar right to be offended by "Merry Christmas"?

9. Since you're demanding respect, do you respect the rights of other Americans, including those who choose to say "Happy Holidays"? Or do you believe that everyone should be required to say "Merry Christmas" and to refer to their decorated tree as a "Christmas tree"? I mean, it's not like the U.S. was founded on the principles of freedom of religion and freedom of speech...oh, wait!

10. How is anyone's saying "Happy Holidays" harming you?

Oh, by the way, I thought the lovely ♥♥♥'s in your post reflected the love expressed in it. Truly in keeping with the spirit of good will towards all during this holiday *gasp!*--yes, I indeed said HOLIDAY--season.

[What I didn't say to my friend, but really wanted to is this: "And as for me posting that rant as my status: pfffftttt!"]

The friend who posted the rant replied with this cogent answer to all my questions: "I have rights too!!!! And I shouldn't have to 'press 1 for English' either!!!"

Uh. Huh. Well, that settles it. I now understand, clearly, exactly how some or all English-as-second-language immigrants are preventing you from saying "Merry Christmas" and putting up a "Christmas tree." And why they need to leave the U.S. immediately as a threat to your traditions (of Christian privilege and anti-immigrant intolerance).

At the pharmacy: Scripture candy

Seen today while shopping at Rite Aid Pharmacy:

The Jesus Tin, embossed with "Jesus, Sweetest Name I Know" containing soft peppermints with wrappers printed with Bible verses, $3.95.

Facebook Follies: US would be better if...

Today's Facebook Folly:

If you think the country would be in better shape if we all started asking for God's help, press like on ♥.

But what do I press if I think the country would be in better shape if we all learned critical thinking skills and became better educated in the sciences?